I didn’t want to do this today. I woke up in a pretty good mood. The sun was shining, the sky was blue, there was a slight chill in the air and I was still a little groggy from the deep sleep I experienced. But, I got out of the warmth of my bed, placed my feet unsteadily on the floor and rose. Phone off the charger and in hand, sweatshirt zipped up, I stepped outside and took the dog on a short walk so he could relieve himself. After he did his business, I did mine. Not outside, but inside my bathroom. Don’t be weird. I walked back in to the bedroom, a kiss to the best Wife in the world and the day was started.

It’s Valentine’s Day.

I felt energized by her kiss, I always do, but coffee was still needed in the morning. So we got dressed, brushed our teeth; What? You never kissed someone in the morning without brushing your teeth first?, went to breakfast at a new, (new to us), corner restaurant in Carlsbad. We like to try new places together. One of the many reasons I like to think we work well together. We are one of those rare couples who actually enjoy spending time with each other. Even after almost 30 years together. I know, we’re like a unicorn playing Rachmaninoff on a saxophone. Rare, a little funny, but beautiful and there’s always great music.

After a delicious breakfast, we drove to the beach. Not too far, since we were in Carlsbad. Car parked and a short walk down stone steps and we were on the sand watching the Pacific Ocean breathe in and out and smash along the shore. The thought of the recent King Tides and people being swept away by large waves on Instagram Reels came to mind and I wondered how long we should be standing there. It didn’t matter. We stood there, for a while, touching the sand and the rocks. I watched her match the breath of the ocean with her own breathing and my heart smiled. She loves the ocean. I love her. We watched a guy in a black wetsuit time himself as he sprinted from the shore, dive into the frigid water, swim to a buoy and back to the shore. I didn’t time him, but it seemed like he was fast. My bride chuckled when I jokingly said, “I could do that, but I don’t wanna.” I like to make her laugh. Thoroughly impressed with his feat, we left the shore, got back in the car, drove home, got the dog and some bottles we’ve been meaning to recycle.

The guy working the Recycle Center was not in the mood to be friendly or kind. So we dropped off the bottles, got about four bucks and some change, then drove to a new coffee shop. New to us. We like to try new things together.

We’ve been here for a little over an hour. I finished my unfortunately bland and flavorless Americano about thirty minutes in to sitting here. Listening to jazz crooners sing classic tunes behind me on the house speakers. Probably a Spotify or maybe Apple Music playlist. Frank Sinatra, Tony Bennett, Mel Tormé and more have been serenading me since we sat down. Good playlist. But, it makes me want a good cocktail more than a coffee. It has to be 5 o’clock somewhere.

Sitting here watching her work, I keep having this thought. “I should write something. It’s been a while.” I ignored the thought. Just kept scrolling through Instagram. Swiping through posts and old photos. Past Influencers peddling products I have no intention of ever using. Until my phone started to lose battery power. Then I remembered, I brought my computer. My new computer my sister bought me for my birthday. She’s an awesome sister. It’s sitting in the case, in my backpack, on the chair next to me.

“Take it out. Open it. Start writing something. Anything. Please.” The thought pushed back. Then another thought came, almost on top of that one.

“I don’t want to. It’s been too long.”

The reply came quickly, “That’s why you do it. Just get the computer, open it and start typing.” 

I fought back. I usually do.

“What if I open it and don’t have anything to say?”

“Then you don’t. That’s not the point.”

I was confused.

“What is the point then? Why try?”

“Because you want to.”

“I do?”

“You do. Just pull it out, open up a page, start typing. Even if it’s crap. Which it will be. Even if it’s sad. Which it will be. Just put some words on a page and let it be what it’s going to be.”

So now, I’m sitting at an 8 foot black table with a fake flower centerpiece in the middle of it, in a new to me coffee shop. Across from my gorgeous wife, watching her work. Jazz behind me, caffeine in me, new computer open and black words on a white page.

I did it.

Happy Valentine’s Day.